Are You Hurting Your Parents Without Realizing It? Here’s How You Might Be

Mother’s Day is almost here. This will be the 2nd one without my mom. Of course she’s been on my mind lately. I miss her.

As I read through http://familyshare.com/family/5-ways-adult-children-hurt-their-parents-without-realizing-it I saw a bit of myself. Although I didn’t forget her birthday and I included her in family events, I know she’d have liked me to call more often. A phone call with her usually meant listening to a litany of complaints and after all these years I was simply worn down. I could have called more often and strategically directed the conversation to something else, but I didn’t. I didn’t exactly ignore her requests for help, but I seldom offered help without being asked. When I was helping, for example with sorting things before they downsized from their home of 30 years to an independent living apartment, I was impatient and left if she was uncooperative with my way of doing things. My intention was to preserve my dignity and sanity. The result was unintentional pain for my parents.

I don’t believe life can be pain free. It just isn’t. My challenge, to myself and to you, is to minimize the amount of pain you cause. Once you’re read the brief article linked above, take a look at yourself and see if there are things you could do better. Parents, what would you like your kids to do or not to do? You’re part of the equation, too. Feel free to add your comments and to share this article with your friends (and maybe your siblings).

Happy Mother’s Day to all you moms out there!